Camille Elise Photographer

NEW BLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOG!

2009-05-18T20:31:00.002-06:00

Okay, so it’s been a dreadfully long time since I’ve posted. But it’s been a bit of a whirl wind these past two months, and trying to find the time to come back here to the words and photos I love seemed impossible. After so much time had passed I knew I couldn’t come back with the same tail between my legs like I do everytime procrastination swallows me whole, so I’ve been working these past two weeks to tweak and adorn with love, my new blog!

Here it is: www.camilleeliseblog.com

Come on over and visit my beautiful new home where I WILL update frequently, PROMISE!

"Joy to the world, all the boys and girls, Joy to the fishes in the deep blue sea, Joy to you and me"

2009-03-03T21:02:00.002-07:00

There’s this magic in people, a little extra dose of something when they smile. The crookedness of their grin, the sparkle deep in their eye, for Brady it’s the deepset crease of his dimples. Most of the time they wink out at me after he’s farted on my hand, or has taught our little brother phrases that drive me up the wall (see: Kakaa), or when he’s asked why the answer is because for the eighth time. But sometimes, when I’ve grappled enough patience to revel in the joy of having someone smaller love you so wholly they wink out at me after he’s said I love you, or squeezed me in a hug so tight my intestines are coming out somewhere, or cuddled into my side reading an Archie.

I love him in a way that prevails over different DNA and different intestinal sputters (see: farts). In December he snagged the coveted role of Mayor in the school Christmas Play, and my blooming pride had my finger glued on rapid fire for the entire hour. And at the end, when he smiled, I remembered I’ve got a dimple set in my chin when I smile real deep, and that’s enough of a resemblance to call us family.

This is his, 'Woman, how can you expect me to smile when I've got Estee Lauder's full line up of rouge on my cheeks?"

My other favorite brother from another mother, Isaiah and his daddy Duncan.

For some unknown reason my internet has decided to work for the past ten minutes, I'm not going to question, but I'm also not going to withdraw my previous 'boo urns' statement ;)

"When you see my face, hope it gives you hell, hope it gives you hell"

2009-03-03T13:04:00.004-07:00

Last Night:

7:32pm - Camille pulls up photoshop and fiddles and twiddles with Brady's Christmas School photos and her most adored Totally Rad Actions

7:56pm - Camille writes mushy, yet somewhat comical loving dedication to brother from another Brady Roe.

8:10pm - Camille attempts to post 2nd day out of monthly blogging goal.

8:11pm - Camille realizes internet has crapped the bucket.

8:12pm - Camille cries.

So in short, Shaw our internet provider will be sending someone out Thursday night. Thus lighting my frequent blogger status up in flames. I apologize for the wee break, and promise to try to post some legitimate photos and mushy writing as soon as humanly possible.

For now, behold my Windows Paint skills:

"Raindrops and roses and whiskers on kittens. Bright copper kettles and warm woolen mittens"

2009-03-01T20:25:00.003-07:00

Okay, so I'm a total slacker, but it's nothing you haven't heard before. Today is March 1st, and I am going to make this the month I blog every single day. In starting this courageously long journey I've gotten some inspiration from my most favorite blogger Jasmine Star. She begun last week her weekly installment of 'Kisses and Disses'. Since I've never been silently opinionated I thought I'd pull my soap box out of the corner, dust it off and start my own little thing here. On principle I needed a little originality and looked to none other than my sleezy Idol Barney Stinson. His resume video (yes you just heard right) featured creative words as "Instaneulous. Connectitude. Transformitatio" below are my shots in the dark at his ridiculawesomeness :)

My Adorbeloved Endorsement Seal
- So, I know I’m not the only one saying this, but I am wholeheartedly head over heels for Slumdog Millionare. If you haven’t seen it, go. Drop what your doing and go. The story’s theme trickled down the fault line in my heart, along with the rest of the worlds. Really what’s more important in this world than unending hope, faith and love?

- Dooce. This is a website I’ve always loved, but have recently bordered on obsession. I spent my entire night Wednesday giggling and wiping tears all the way through the archives. Her site is utterly unique and even if you can’t relate to having kids, you have to be able to identify with wanting to constitute a no-pants zone around your house.

- Having the house to yourself. I don’t always like being along, but on some occasions its just absolutely delicious. Last night I absolutely basked in the glow of stretching my feet out on the couch, cheesy romantic comedy after cheesy romantic comedy on the tv and, carrot sticks. That last part was a bit of a buzz kill, but I guess you can’t have everything.

My Detesrevulsion Condemnation Seal
- Winter. My once frosty friend has morphed into an enemy. Yesterday’s -42C Wind Chill had me wanting to cocoon into my seven down blankets for all of eternity.
- Ben&Jerry’s Chocolate Fudge Brownie. I have yet to be able to grocery shop without longingly resorting to the frozen treats aisle. This week I’ve been trying to prove I’ve got a backbone, but there’s definitely been some grumbling on my bypass to the vegetable section.

- Calgary Transit. It’s unreliable, dirty and slow. As if I need anymore reasons than that.

"Because days come and go, but my feelings for you are forever"

2009-02-12T19:57:00.017-07:00

So as far as blogs go, I'm officially stating as rule #37 for this one in particular, that just because my severe procrastination and lack of time management leads to the delaying of posts, does not mean I don't love the subject any less. It's more a reflection of poor genetic material that I've been given, and well that I've been up to my eye balls busy with everyday life.

Last month my favorite home boy M turned the big 1-2. Marc is my youngest cousin, and I don't know if it's him being youngest, or him just being him that makes me want to hunt down Marty Mcfly and figure out once and for all the formula for the perfect time machine. He has so many things that I hope stick growing up, the gruff scratch in his voice, the way he actually listens when I'm reading Narnia, his pleading face to tell him one more story, the tilt of his grin when he's on his dirtbike, the way his eyes close when he lies, so many things I hope my brain doesn't lose grasp of over time.

Here's some pictures of the big celebration, fingers crossed they jog some memories decades down the road :)

This is from his Poker birthday party earlier in the day, I loved the shots. And yes, I just said Poker birthday party.
What can I say, our family rolls in cool.

My favorite bugsy.

Who can say no to more cake? Not moi!

One more thing I hope you never lose: Your public speaking ability.

My favorite.

Marker, you are so much to so many, I love you so much I even looked up the best suitable Papa Roach song that suited. And if that isn't love, then hell if I know what is.

"Well I know that it's a wonderful world from the sky down to the sea"

2009-02-02T21:15:00.002-07:00

Here's the rest of Trena + Craig's big day that I promised....

Married!

I LOVE how this shot of the first dance turned out, like they're in their own little world.

Craig's Dear Granny, so, so sweet.

Cake made by the one and only Karla Hannah

Perforated line, for easy cutting ;)

These two have been friends since they were eleven. I'm pretty sure it sums up the lot of it.

Since I was the one taking photos and Karla's already engaged she promised to put in her best effort on my behalf. Here is what ensued:

(She gets an A++ no?)

In closing I leave you with the best gem of the whole night. My Krafty K. You remind me so much of the best of my mother that it's sometimes breathtaking. Words will never be able to describe how much I love and cherish having you in my life, especially, having your fantastical roger rabbit move in my life. I love you.

"You are inspiration to my life, you are the reason why I smile, You are a beautiful surprise"

2009-01-29T20:37:00.002-07:00

I was photographing my first wedding.

All by myself.

Just me.

There was this humming throb of nervous excitement stuck in me, the back of my throat, the center of my heart. And then they walked in; with their calmly exuberant faces, and gently clasped hands.

Stepping up to the altar they shared the most beautifully open embrace, a gesture lit by the love they have for each other, accompanied by their gentle repeating voices. And all you could feel was still, how beautiful she looked it hurt, how wide his smile stretched, the quiet of the moment.

I felt like planets aligned staring at their love through my lens. Trena and Craig I am so blessed to have been a part of your day, my gratitude will echo forever for your trust in me.
xoxo, Camille.

.

Note: I'm adding the Ceremony and Reception in the next post, I'm excited, let me drag it out! :)

"How long on this longest day til' we finally make it through"

2009-01-21T10:43:00.004-07:00

I'm A. No B. Mmmmm, A. Ugh.

An entire boatload of THE best wedding photographers have been making installment videos to pump up WPPI 2010, here's their latest episode.

I think I'm totally for Team B. But there is of course always time to sway my mind :)

While you're at all this check out WPPI for all the latest in convention news!!!

"And I want these words to make things right, But it's the wrongs that make the words come to life."

2009-01-11T21:18:00.002-07:00

Have you ever just stood at the departures gate at the airport? Taken a small moment to watch all of the different people facing that inevitable last glimpse of their loved one before security? Some people face it head strong, smile pasted on, some people take it a little harder. I’ve always fallen heavily into that latter category.

I hate goodbyes. Loathe might be the better word, I think they’re horrible in that impossible to avoid sort of way. But the worst kind of goodbye is the one where you aren’t expecting it. In four sleeps my cousin Layne says goodbye to her bestest of friends, a move gaping their normal 0.3 km from each other to nearly 4000.

They’ve had this past entire week to cram every last bit of friendship from baguette fighting to flour throwing in. Yesterday I took them out to try to do my best to put their friendship into some sort of tangible thing they could hold to remember. And while taking the pictures I remembered in that most magnificently thirteen year old way as hard as life can shake you, there are always pockets of true and absolute joy. No matter the distance of state lines, nothing can take the love they have for each other. Not their shared secrets, or hysterical laughter, that’s all there’s. Forever.

I love this one.

This one will forever go down as one of the best pictures I have and will ever take.

I’d really like to hope these two aren’t saying goodbye, more as, see you later with a bit of an emphasis on the later.

"Come on come on, Turn a little faster, Come on come on, the world will follow after, Come on come on, Because everybody's after love"

2008-12-30T21:38:00.003-07:00

You know those people who are so important you could stare at a blinking cursor for hours without grasping the right words? My big cousin Karla is just like that. Too many things to pinpoint just one that’s impacted my life, personality, happiness the most.

I spent nearly my entire childhood trying to emulate each facet of her larger than life personality that I could clutch. That kind of admiring idolization has evened out more these days, but I still love her with my entire heart just like an eager ten year old.
And like that eager ten year old I met her fiancée Mat this weekend. And couldn’t help but stare at their crushingly endearing and side-splitting hilarious gestures in awe. Needless to say, my happy-ending loving self had a pretty ridiculous smile on the entire time.

Here’s to two of my most favorite geek burgers, I hope you always look at each other the way you do, it’s a small nickel of faith in a sometimes pretty cynical world.

"When it snows, ain't it thrilling, though your nose gets a chilling, we'll frolic and play, the eskimo way, walking in a winter wonderland"

2008-12-18T22:23:00.003-07:00

I love Christmas and I love taking photographs so when Jen asked me to take some photos of her and her family setting up the tree it was a no brainer. Her parents come home this week from Dubai (Insert severe jealous remarks here) and the kids wanted some recent shots since well, they haven’t been ‘kids’ for quite some time now.

When I walked into their kitchen Christmas music was playing at that perfect level, you know, couple notches below ugly department store boom, and couple notches above a hum, and Jen was making perfect steaming mugs of marshmallow hot chocolate, and well the whole thing just seemed perfect. Far from any Christmas I’ve ever known, where everyone runs like hellions to fight for the first present opened and the last jam-jam cookie. It was such a wonderful cozy afternoon, fingers crossed I enter a similar sophisticated domain within the next decade :)

Out of all the pictures I’ve taken these past couple months, I have to say these next ones were some of my all time favorite to edit. Like sitting at my computer I could feel the winter chill goosebump across my skin, and hear Jennifer’s wicked laughter right before she shoved Katherine into the dump of snow. Thanks for helping me out with my portfolio Jen, Katherine and Alex, hopefully the rents love these as much as I do!!

My favorite...

"I think it's about forgiveness"

2008-12-06T23:47:00.003-07:00

I'm sometimes a little self-centered. Another one of those 'human condition' things that I guess I'm still trying to work on. I sometimes get in a tailspin where a deep breath and step back seem inconceivable and impossible. I spent the better part of the last forty eight hours unloading the unbearable sadness weighing on my heart to several of my most patient and listening loved ones.

I spoke the truth as my heart knew it, said bitter, pained words. Cried the ugly cry. You know that one, where your past kleenex, and snot knows no bounds. The one reserved for Oprah, Sirius falling behind the veil, September 11th, Denny dying on Grey's, and life's hardest disappointments. And behind all that truth, and all those tears I realized sometimes you just have to pick yourself up. And there's really nothing more than that. Dust yourself off, and keep going.

And once your pride is free of dirt, that's when you see that with a deep breath and step back, as hard as life hits you sometimes, the sadness of it isn't unbearable. WIth those that love you most at your side, it's not even close.

Due to my intense self-centered pity party this next part is a little shout out to those 'most patient and listening loved ones' so this might be a little boring if your not one of these next six people.

Melanie: We may not still be on Stradwick Rise, but you are always welcome in my house, my refrigerator, and I will cook you something to eat any hour of the day you need it. I promise when the time comes, I too, will do right by my children and family as you have.
Karla: There may be 1000 km between us, but I love you in the same way I loved you lying side by side in my bunk bed a decade ago. Fingers and toes are crossed-13. You deserve every happiness this world has to offer.
Marwa: My hearts understanding of friendship will always be wrapped in the backseat of an SUV, scored to Clay Aiken himself, hand grasped in yours. Thank you for always standing up for me, believing I deserve more, deserve better.
Marissa: Thank the stars you were free of my angsty self this weekend, Wildberry Spritzer and Harvest Cheddar Crisps are but a fraction of my love for you. 8:00am this morning I hope you felt the swell of enormous pride I had for you all the way in Lethbridge. Ten bucks says you aced it. If this photography thing bails, I call dibs on the basement of your mansion.
Aunty Pam: Who still can't quite figure out the internet enough to read this. In my heart, you are every bit like a mother to me as Claudia McGlynn was. Thank you for the truth, your hugs, your biscuits and your gentle voice, they mean more to me than any other in the world.
Morgan: I wish I could return to a basement filled with a Courtney dartboard and kinder surprise contraptions, and tell myself to put down the phone. Some things really are lost causes, and decade long heart ache is never worth it.

For anyone who made it all the way down here I thought I'd throw in a couple more favorites from Mel and Duncan's shots the other day, with some ones of the whole family we had taken the night before.

Mel and I both loved the feeling of this one

"Come what may... I will love you until my dying day"

2008-12-03T20:57:00.002-07:00

I remember Mel as our housing complex's bona-fide babe. I remember her undying love for any and every shade of purple. I remember her willingness to follow my Mum's crazy whims. I remember waterfights, trick or treating, Tony Romas, IKEA Meat Balls, beautiful hairclips, Le Chateau Couture, and Dana the Daytona.

I think she remembers my braces and what a sassy little mouth piece I could be.

Along the shelves of my heart Mel's got her place, tucked securely since 1998. I am brave enough to admit that sometimes my faith in life can flicker, sometimes a second, an hour, a month, but I attribute my inability to let the faith in myself flicker to them. And as far as public declarations of love go, here is mine to them: I believe in you. In your marriage, as individuals and as a family, life's not perfect, flipping far from it. If anyone knows this it's us. But at the end of the day we have each other, and if we can't have anything else, at least we have that.

Here's Melanie and her husband Duncan, roaming Heritage Park on a free hour pried away from the children of the corn. I mean my brothers Zack, Brady and Isaiah :)

This is my favorite cheeky Mel smile!

"This world keeps spinnin' and there's no time to waste"

2008-12-01T10:22:00.001-07:00

There’s a lot I’m not sure about in life. I think it’s part of the human condition, to constantly wonder and question the bends in the road. But I think growing up, I hit a trip switch somewhere and somehow my general curiosity squared and I ended up with a worry stone as a heart.

In quiet moments I’m always there, worrying, wondering, wondering, worrying. Am I faced in the right direction? Does Heaven exist? Did my Mother get in? Should I grow my hair out? Will my future husband let me have the seventeen kids I want to? Do I tell those I love I love them enough? How much more time is left?

Suffice it to say, I wonder about these things often. But I have found one thing that can always still the flutter of unending questions, one thing that unsquares the fretful equation covering my heart. Children. In their unending simplicity they make any and all what-ifs disappear. The way they let laughter spill loud and clear without any apprehension, the way they’re eyes spark over the tiniest secret, they way their smaller palms fit inside your own, the way doubt doesn’t notch on their decision making list.

Yesterday I watched one of my younger brothers sleeping on the couch, totally zonked, dead to the world, nothing could wake him sleep. Staring at his calm expression made me realize that it’ll be okay if I’m faced upside down and turned around, and that no matter where my mother is I still love her and she still loves me, it doesn’t really matter what length my hair is, wait until I meet the poor unsuspecting guy before I spring double digit rugrat rearing on him, fears can be conquered-everyone knows I love them, and even one more day should be enough.

"You Got Me Begging For Mercy, Why Won't You Release Me"

2008-11-25T21:56:00.003-07:00

Last year I had made a bet with my cousin Marc. We had been sitting around the kitchen as usual, and it had been weeks of watching and listening to him cockily strut around that he just knew exactly what he was getting for his birthday. One for surprises, I'd had enough of his prodding and guessing, to shut the little punk up I blurted that I'd got him underwear. And they were pink. I figured hah, that'll show him. His face slowly morphed like a Looney Toons Cartoon, the elated smile he'd been wearing was turned down sharply at its sides. And then, just to show me, he perked right up, "No, you're not". Well I'm sure everyone here can imagine the childish teeter totter of arguing that ensued.

Even though I knew he was right, I did something next that perhaps turned the tables and made me into the cocky strutter. I bet him that I did, and he'd be sorry when he opened them up come January 18th. My Aunt wasn't much for children wagering any real money, so we bet something much much worse.

Two full minutes of non-stop tickling.

I knew I was in for it, but I couldn't help it with how ridiculously hilarious the two of us had become. Weeks passed, and of course I didn't subject the poor eleven year old to pink underwear. The day happened to fall after my first trip out on the ski hill, and in stiff movements I bowed my head. We had agreed to the terms, the commencement would take place in the upstairs jacuzzi tub, you know, in case accidents happened (Hey! Two minutes is a long time). Since I figured I'd be in for some thrashing, and to get an extra giggle from the kids I strapped on my snowboard helmet, complete with goggles and hopped in.

And you know the little bugger tickled me for nearly two whole minutes straight without a breath. It was truly one of the most overwhelmingly pricelessly hilarious moments of my entire life. I hope as he grows up I'll never forget the hoarse sound of his laugh as his hands jabbed mercilessly at my sides. This weekend I snuck up on him in a much quieter moment, at the piano his concentration was endearing, reminding me of the littler rotters sweeter side. (For a quick laugh there's an old snapshot of the ticklement of death at the bottom ;)

Haha!

"Tell Me You'll Open Your Eyes"

2008-11-24T21:58:00.002-07:00

I have these moments, and I’m sure in an attempt to explain them I nearly always sound like I’m trying to take the academy from Jack Nicholson’s R.P. McMurphy. But nonetheless I still have them. Like warped intuition or a really distinctive gut feeling. Only it’s not in my gut, it’s in my heart. It sneaks up on me quietly and then out of nowhere in the most remarkably ordinary moments of my life my heart clenches. Again it’s a weird mix, almost like a slight stroke I’d imagine, very close to wicked heart burn; this throbbing like a flickering warning sign not of an impending heart attack, but rather to slow down, and just open your eyes.

.......The sea-doo tube knocking sluggishly against the dock, knees stickily stuck to Layne and Braye, my voice a steady whisper of Cullen History, warm hands curled into the sides of my arms.

.......Marwa's incredulous wide eyes over the bag of popcorn, the comfort in thinking the same thought, smiling the same smile, drooling the same drool.

.......The kitchen echoing with choking laughter, Aunty Pam's glowing eyes filled to the brim with my latest telling disaster.

.......My IPOD Shuffle skidding to a halt on The Plumb Song, "Feel I can Touch The Sky" down to the ends of my fingertips.

The pit of your happiness is in those simple moments, and if you breath in deep you can hold it carefully in your palm. I hope my heart never stops kicking me in the tush in reminder to cherish all that is so easily overlooked.

Here's a peek at my next happiness explosion blog post: **Fun Cabin Times** :)

"Trouble is her only friend, and he's back again"

2008-11-21T17:32:00.003-07:00

There are few things in this life that I love more than live music.

Nearly twenty one years ago I attended my first, an amazing concert I'm told: Blue Rodeo live in the park. My Mum a music lover herself had brought me along, sharpied my name and address to my diaper and thus began my life long devotion to concerts and Jim Cuddy.

Last night James Blunt hit the Saddledome, and in two hours made me fall even more in love with his dreamy crooning. Here's some snapshots from the night:

**I had to include this next picture, at one point James ran around the arena and in my most heroic effort to capture a close up shot for Amanda, I stood precariously on the tip of my foldable chair, note: BAD IDEA! About 4.2 seconds after this shot was taken, the chair flipped and I want ass over face into the next row. Needless to say I didn't get the picture.

1973

The only thing better than James Blunt? James Blunt and confetti!

PS. I am going to the Twilight opening tonight, I will return tomorrow with amazing pictures of my obsessive fandom :)

"Oh Baby, Give me One More Chance, Won't You Please Let Me, Back In Your Heart"

2008-11-19T22:40:00.003-07:00

Each Wednesday after my photoshop class, I plunk onto the bench outside of SAIT and wait for my bus. Route #19, its an accursed route I tell you, you've got to spin three times, while hopping on one leg, with one eye closed to even wildly hope that it might come on time. So when it came time for me to take up my usual seat, I thought twice, I was feeling invigorated, my newly snazzed up sharpening and dodging skills were pumping through my blood, heck why couldn't I just walk with all this pent up energy?

Fourteen blocks later, and my sixth patch of black ice later, I wasn't so invigorated. The cold had weaseled into the toes of my boots, and my scarf was frayed frozen at the ends, how on earth was I going to keep going for eight more blocks? And then I did what I do everytime I'm feeling sad or low...I took my Ipod off Shuffle, scrolled to J, and hit play to the perfect Motown Remedy, that's right: The Jackson 5: more specifically, "I Want You Back". I bounced, bopped and boogied the rest of the way, and managed to make it all in one piece, and in a perfectly decent mood. Feeling as bumpin' as I am I feel like dabbling with all my new mad photoshop skills, but I fear my pillow is hollering my name quite loudly.

Instead I'll leave you with this awesome picture of my desk, a shock indeed that it is somewhat clean. I think that's why I even took this shot, it's one in a series of several to show that I do sometimes actually clean my room, thank you very much! It's got several of my most favorite things in it: Finished scrapbook pages, Jim, BFF Photobooth Shots, and one of my favorite xmax frames of my family.

"It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas..."

2008-11-17T10:11:00.003-07:00

Calgary has been plowed over with several inches of snow and I've spent the last several days frolicking around and joyfully pulling out my Christmas stuff. My fingers are crossed tight, hoping that it'll all last till December 25th, I figured in between wrapping presents I could hop on here and answer a cute litle quick survey Catie tagged me in :)

Rules

- Link to the person who tagged me
- Mention the rules
- Reveal seven quirky and/or weird facts about yourself
- Tag seven other bloggers by linking to them
- Go to each of their blogs and leave a message letting them know they’ve been tagged!

You asked for it...well, actually you didn't, but here it is anyways:
- On my days off, I wear odd shoes.
- I hate when food touches on my plate.
- Baking sweets is one of my favorite things to do on days off.
- I watch White Christmas to solve any problem.
- The hum of dirtbikes at the ten second board is one of my favorite sounds in the whole world.
- I think Digital Scrapbooking is lazy, and nothing will ever replace flipping through a touchable album.
- My family attracts such disasters, that most now refer to us as "The Griswolds"...thank you Chevy Chase!

And I'm tagging: Marwa, Marissa, Caitlin, Michelle, Shelley, Mary, and Jason.

And since I am in such a fantastically Christmas-ey mood here's a shot of me and my and Layney Bugfy with our favorite pot-bellied man :)

"How Did We Get Here, I Think I Know How"

2008-11-11T14:22:00.002-07:00

This morning I rode my bike to work, not as a heroic healthy choice in our below zero weather, but as the only alternative remaining in my losing battle with the snooze button. I clicked the horrifically unstylish helmet to my head, wiped the sleep out of my eyes and eased onto the cooly uncomfortable seat.

It took only five minutes before I questioned my very sanity. As someone who generally loves winter in it entirety I found myself grumbling obscenities to Jack Frost himself wishing for another layer, a sunny beach vacation, or even just a drop in the wind chill. Though I did manage to cruise into work, fly-aways absolutely everywhere and red-faced, I spent the next three hours drifting in and out of focused concentration and that longing for warmth.

I got home a little while ago, and in digging up on my old hard drive found these pics of us goofballs at the Cabin. While it's no Hawaii, I can definitely feel warmth when I look at them.

"What you feel is what you are, and what you are is beautiful"

2008-11-09T10:45:00.003-07:00

Secrets. They’re everywhere.

Tenderly tucked into the pockets of our greatest hopes, whispered softly into the ears of loved ones, bellowed to empty fields, printed in the lines of a journals—they’re like magic, rarely touchable and nearly always invisible to even the most dedicated eye. And maybe that’s what makes them so special; they bypass our entire sensory system, we can’t see them, smell them, taste them, none of this, all we can do is feel them, and let them fill up our entire chest with that indescribable weighty delightfulness.

On Sundays, I pull up to my computer, my Jack Skellington mug full with tea, milk and two sugars, and for ten minutes I devour everyone’s postcard, their anonymous bravery to write to the universe their own secret. Whoever hasn’t heart of it, here’s the link:

I’ve posted a few below that have stuck with me: PostSecret

Had to throw this hilarious one in for good measure!

"Yes We Can"

2008-11-04T22:18:00.002-07:00

Goosebumps. From the curves of my ears, to the tips of my toes.

The passionate realism that rang in the deep tones of his voice had those goosebumps tugging at the edges of my tears. His politics are so real, so passionate, so heart stoppingly human. I think the United States has a far way to come to rebuild their nation, but I think the choice that was made tonight is the first brick among many.

I am so proud to be part of a lifetime that gets to witness such a moment.

"They Say Home Is Where The Heart Is"

2008-11-01T21:48:00.002-06:00

In one of the most defining moments of my life, I stood in the middle of a cabin, toes covered in dirt, hair knotted with lake water, eyes clouded with the jaggededness of old wounds, staring disbelievingly at Layne. I had just spent the last half hour wearing a patch in the hardwood with my incessant pace and grumbled insecurities, my disparing hope for a family had spread to every corner in the room, and in a heartbeat with the simplicity only an eleven year old could muster she had declared she would be my fubbubly. What a fubbubly is I'm still not sure we've fully defined, but in that moment, and every moment after it's been an inbetween line of more than family, more than cousin and sister and friend, so much so that I'm sure I'll never find that perfect word to describe the hooking of our elbows and twining of our hearts.

It's with a breath of utter contentment that I sit here, toes polished in 'it's up to you' blue, hair conditioned and combed, eyes mended with the patch of a good sewer that I can say Layne is part of the best family I could have ever wished for myself. I hope she always giggles from under my funny bone, and always catches in my throat with her surprising softness.

And it's because of all this, that despite my dreadful fear of horses, saddles and ponies that I followed her out to the barn and one of her great loves to document the sun on her face on a beautiful Sunday.

She likes to pretend sometimes I'm not the funniest person ever...

But really we all know better ;)

"Take a chance, take a chance take a take a chance chance"

2008-10-24T20:17:00.005-06:00

I love boardgames. Always have, always will. But there will forever be one that stands out in my mind, that game among games that truly shows you the essence of one's character. A teetering slope that can turn nasty at the drop of the die. No matter who you play with I find you need to reign it in, because at the hour and a half mark, things can get real ugly, give or take Park Place. Last week Amanda, Mark and I pulled up a seat and proceeded to in the most sportsmanshiply fashion to yell, whine, argue and barter our way across the board.

Monopoly. Ah, the joy...

You can tell a lot by how each player sorts their money: Amanda prefers banklike sorting, and I like mine all in a stack....and then there's Mark....

All down hill from here!

Note: The title of this blog is solely dedicated to one of my best cousins Krafty K...the person who has forever instilled in me to break into ABBA whenever reaching for a chance card.

"Sound of the drums, beating in my heart"

2008-10-22T18:53:00.003-06:00

I've liked hockey for as far back as I can remember.

But on a cold shivery night nearly two years ago, it turned from a torrid lusty affair, into a commited loving relationship. That's right, I fell in love with hockey. We all sat huddled close, bums frozen to the sub-zero metal of the stands, our eyes torn between the the blaring scoreboard and rough scrape of the sticks. With the buzzer ticking down those last agonizingly delicious seconds, the puck shot its way across the goalie crease; and for a brilliant slice of time everything slowed in that perfection of granted childhood dreams. My ten year old cousin had won his tournament along side the rest of his Southland Speed Hockey team.

Whooping excitedly through the halls we came across the tallied score banner, and in what I now refer to as a 'fit of jubilant afterglow' I ripped the sticky tape and ran hysterically giggling from the arena. My younger cousins howled following behind the trailing meter of paper. What sealed the deal in my mind was the look on Marc's face, this look that completely reinforced my belief that there was no pizzaz in quiet pride, and expressive gestures were far too underrated.

Since then I can't help but equate hockey with that sense of over the top pride, love, joy, overwhelming excitement. This past Sunday the boys mangled together two on two street hockey and it brought me back to that childish glee. And really at the end of the day, what is better than capturing childish glee?

Okay, forget what I said about glee. This is serious stuff....

And here's some of my favorite bugsy thrown in for good measure!

"And when you figure you out love is all that matters after all, it sure makes everything else seem so small"

2008-10-20T21:51:00.002-06:00

It's part of the human condition to be afraid, and being incredibly human I've always had my fair share. Stairs with no backs, dark basements, freddy krueger, rickety houses. I've got a pretty standard case of don't-like-to-be-alone-itis; all of my fears echo this. But weeks ago I faced one of my biggest while scrolling through my regular blog sites. In a simple post Jasmine Star wrote that she feared not saying I love you enough.

In six words I felt like a spotlight had shone hotly on the tightest place in my chest. My hands clammed, throat squeezed and it took a good handful of minutes to be able to gulp down the reality of my very palpable fear.

I've always been one of those people who gushes affection, it was one of the very best things my Mum taught me how to do. One of the very best things she knew how to do. Our life was turbulent at best sometimes, but even in the shakiest moments I never doubted her love for me or me for her. When she died, I realized that even saying it every breath didn't feel like enough, and that my heart would always wish desperately for one more chance to say it.

In the heartbreak of my loss for her, I've realized how many more chances I get to say it to all of the other wonderful people in my life. So in a celebration of living life to it's fullest brim I've been pinning essays in hallmark cards to all my loved ones, a small token that hopefully shows they are always in my thoughts, my heart.

Here are some of the classics I picked up recently:

"Make it last forever friendship never ends"

2008-10-15T19:50:00.003-06:00

"2wit Function: noun: Astuteness of perception or judgement; the ability to relate seemingly disparate things so as to illuminate or amuse."

Or as I like to call it, really clever humor. Now everyone has their own style, me myself I usually prefer the self-deprecating variety, but my friend Marissa, she has the gift of wit. Humor so quick you might just miss it if you're not careful. Putting aside all biases, I think she really could give Ferris Bueller a run for his money.

If I had to pick, I would have to say it's my most very favorite thing about her. If I didn't have to pick I could go on for days with everything that makes her one of the shiniest gems my life has ever stumbled upon. The way her dashboard always finds its way to classic rock, no matter what the city. Her abundant love for all things pink, Disney, and my little pony. Her intensely intelligent political arguments. Her complete and utter dedication to Foose. The way she rattles the nails in my true love soapbox. The way she's been my friend so all-encompassingly these past seven years it's hard to blink into a past where we could not have met. In short I love her, most ardently.

And as for Marwa, well she's got a similar paragraph. She's shown me that in the silences of people and their relationships, if you look closely you can truly grasp the beauty of the human condition. And I think for the rest of my time on earth, my heart will always enjoy those silences most with her. She is so caring that it's painfully breathtaking, her strength and fervor for those she loves is a talent beyond what most have been given, and I know my dented and battered spirit might not have made it out beating without her fierce protectiveness and love.

I hope cheesy pop always rates highest on her nano. Hope that no one ever understands why I like From Justin to Kelly but her. Hope that her Edward comes along sooner than later. Hope she always reminds me to change my toothbrush when it's splayed. Hope she never forgets the swiffer dance move. Hope I can become half the woman she's become. Hope that she is my friend forever.

And after all that soppy mush we can finally get to the good stuff, here's the pictures from our Edmonton trip a couple weeks ago...

Marissa and Marwa inside the whale mouth @ West Ed

Best Bday cake ever.

I know, you're jealous!

Walk down by the river valley..

You never know when you won't get to say I love you again, and so I have to say it one more time, I love you both, to the moon and back.

"Oh! The good old hockey game, Is the best game you can name; And the best game you can name, Is the good old Hockey game!"

2008-10-13T14:18:00.003-06:00

I had one of those amazing weekends, you know the ones that stretch so wide it feels like the start of another week just might not be so bad. It was one of those.

Friday seemed like it would never come, and when it finally did I had the awesome surprise of meeting up with a friend on his way to the airport for an amazing boys trip to Costa Rica. Yes, as I sit and type this with a sweater and the furnace on, they are on a beach, surfing in gorgeous sunset. But, don't worry I'm not jealous at all :)

Saturday, we hit up the Calgary Flames Season opener. And in completely ignoring the health conscious part of our brains we ordered not one, but two large nachos. And coca-cola. And four malts. I blame the Saddledome really, something about the atmosphere just begs you to eat those vein clogging foods you'd never normally consider. We ended up losing, which was a complete bummer in overtime, but it was still a great game to watch. As big of a fan of hockey as I am, I haven't been to very many games and Uncle Keith got us row eleven centre ice, so seeing the sweat down Lombardi's face was worth it all.

Sunday we did the trek up to Sylvan for Thanksgiving. I think I've finally gotten to a place where some of these holidays aren't nearly as hard as they've been in the previous two years. It's so hard to even consider sinking into a melancholy mood with how crazy my family is, and I wouldn't really have it any other way. Crude, loud, hilarious, I am thankful for every person and what they bring to the table.

So all in all it was a fantastic weekend, and while my outer thighs might not be thanking me, my heart sure is.

"All Kinds of weather, we stick together, the same in the rain or sun, two different faces, but in tight places, we think and we act as one"

2008-10-07T21:46:00.014-06:00

I can't quite pinpoint the right word to describe my sister.

Hilarious. Beautiful. Loving. Kind. Outgoing. Giggly. Reasonable. Serious. Organized. Conscientious. Dependable. Perceptive. Sensitive. Original. Open-Minded. Creative. Practical. Enthusiastic. Intellectual.

I could go on, but in a word, she's wonderful. She reminds me to be exactly who I am, never anything else. Someone who subtly and unconsciously reminds my eyes to lighten, heart to burst, and soul to feel like it's okay to let itself be unburdened.

I wish so many things for her, that I've creased them like crunched post-its into the folds in my heart as if the allusion of keeping some things secret somehow grants them into fruition. When I think of all that life has to offer, it's happinesses, pains, hurts, accomplishments, hurdles...all the things that make life life, I can't help but naively plead a bargain with all higher powers and twisting fates to let the tearful heartbreaks of my life grant her a free spirit and a heart unbidden with pain.

But, I suppose that's what being a sister is. And if there's one thing I am certain of, it's that being her sister, truly is one of the most all encompassing joys I've ever been given in this life. A couple weeks ago I got to spend one of the best possible Friday nights getting re-aquainted with my never far, inner-goofball. With Dad and Alixe at the Elton John concert, we channeled the Sir himself, blasted Rocket Man and with the help of Canon's self timer we had a night to remember.

"Life is a highway, I wanna drive it all night long..."

2008-10-03T11:32:00.001-06:00

To say the term best friend seems so incredibly inadequate, it’s almost laughable. After all we’ve been through it’s hard to really find any words that can do Marissa and Marwa any sort of justice at all.

It’s been nearly eight years since I gulped down the dread of high school rejection and walked up to their table in the cafeteria. I’d been fifteen a handful of days, and in Grade Ten a handful more, but I still knew how quickly cliques formed, like impenetrable little venn diagrams that no matter how much you longed to overlap never seemed budge easily.

I had seen them as ‘cool kids’, a band geek to the core in my Junior High years I wasn’t quite sure I could make the daunting leap, but for once I shoved my shyness to the deepest part of my stomach and launched my name at them in some sort of spastic high pitched shriek. To this day, I wonder how they didn’t knee-jerk it out of there faster then you can say ‘freak show’ but I guess fate is fate.

We’ve been nearly inseparable since, and I can’t begin to imagine a life any other way.

This weekend, more precisely in six hours, Marissa and I are squeezing onto the QE2 to visit Marwa, who has been sentenced to three more semesters at the University of Alberta. So I won’t be around this weekend, but I do promise once I’m back I’ll be sure to keep updated with regular posting.

And because a post with no photos is no post at all, here’s a sneak peak for next week.

Braye. Camille. Bennie. The Jets.

More to follow next week :)

"Take a journey through the mind of a Riddler"

2008-09-30T10:56:00.003-06:00

So this morning I sat, at the unholy hour of five am, oatmeal in hand, clicking my way down the list of photography blogs that’s accumulated as of late in my favorites column. What with joining [b] school, I’ve added a half dozen new links to scatter among my usual Jasmine Star and Jessica Claire visits.

In an effort to really align with the schools attitude I know how important it is to have regular visitors, let alone the rampant joy a new comment brings (Don’t tell me I’m the only one here whose smile could rival Jack Nicholson’s Joker when someone new comments!)

So there I was the last of my apple cinnamon delight faced with four un-updated blogs. Well. How, rude. The nerve of some people! Don’t they know that I’ve got to have something to read in amidst blow drying my hair and tying my shoes?

And that’s when I came here to notice that indeed I haven’t just let one or two days pass like my fellow photographers; it’s been a whole week since my last post. So maybe you’ll forgive my previously complaining paragraph, as procrastination, me and him, we’re pretty tight.

I’ll try not to list my way through familiar excuses though will note that I spent the last three days consumed with packing tape, boxes and newspaper. My original thought had been to wait until we were settled and my new Imac arrived, but in relying on Canada Post we could be here a while. In an attempt to eliminate whining next week about my woeful shipment problems as an excuse for blog neglect I figured I’d post and say I am attempting to improve my patience.

Let’s stare at my beautiful new computer—I am still unsure which joy is greater, the joyful ease of an Apple making it’s way into my hands, or the joyful glee in which my PC will be tossed of the balcony….I’ll get back to you

In googling this, I found it might not be the most appropriate description, I was going for unbridled happiness, not deranged psycho, but ah well, can't be perfect.

** Note: If anyone has comments just bursting out of them feel free to leave some here and spread some of the love to my fellow [b] school friends :) **
Catie Ronquillo
Jenn Galloway
Jessica Hanaumi

"I want more, impossible to ignore"

2008-09-23T12:57:00.002-06:00

September 17th, 9:47am I placed a ridiculously panicked phone call to Amanda. [B] School registration had started early and between my improperly loading browser and Alberta’s inability to be a State I was jittery, nervous and convinced that there was no way she was typing fast enough.

After several irritated minutes she finally submitted my application, and after several more agitated hours I got my email acceptance and let my intense sigh of relief morph into a ludicrous shriek of excitement.

With my patience sometimes akin to that of a six year old, logging in that first time felt something a little like bursting into Toys ‘R’ Us on Boxing Day. Needless to say I’ve spent the last few days perusing, and even surprising myself by contributing in several board discussions.

As a side and random tangent that I promise wraps around to my point, I’ve been re-reading my most favorite of novels “Breaking Dawn”. There’s this quote near the end where the ever so marvelous Edward tells Bella “It’s not every day that you get everything you wanted, and everything you didn’t think to ask for”. It is not only my favorite part of that book, but such an amazing description.

It is exactly how I feel about this site. The people, discussions, clubs, friends, I think it’s going to be revolutionary and it’s only just begun. Even so early support swells over the edges of the forum, I can’t wait for all that is to come…

2008-09-18T12:30:00.003-06:00

In business with catching up, I owed some photos on here of my mini-excursion to Rocky Mountain House. My grandfather has decided months back to make the trek from Nanaimo to our beautiful prairie-laden province, and I managed to finagle a couple days of work off to head up with him to my Uncle Brendan and Aunty Anne’s new place.

We had a fantastic time jam-packed (literally) with every type of athletic adventure possible. It was a great trip all around, and while several of my muscle groups ached for Bailey’s and a massage I managed to come back to Calgary all in one piece.

Here’s my most favorite photos, with some lovely added commentary (Bear with me for some, it was a little hard for my brain not to stumble for an adequate description of Aquatic Target and Race to Mow.)

Our first day started with an approx. 4 hour trek with this sign at the front, it made me slightly weary:

This waterfall at the end was beyond worth the kajillion kilmetres it took to reach:

The Gang: Grandpa, Anne, Me and Brendan.

This photo is so entirely my Grandfather I feel like it could have been taken down the lane from where he grew up in Ireland.

Then we moved onto poker, of which our music selection was delightfully chosen by Aunty Anne:

Game Face:

Game Face?

Ahhh and now I can explain that while most take in rainy days with a good movie and a fire we spent ours launching twenty eight water balloons at poor innocent teddy bears:

I so had the disadvantage in this round, I tied all of these and had to experience several fatal accidents in where me, the dogs, the window and the entire kitchen floor were soaked by imploding renegades:

On to Croquet, where I may add I was half an inch from winning when my sneaky Aunt punted me to the next acreage:

And now for pictures that won't hardly come close to the incredibly awesomeness that was racing the John Deere around a timed obstacle course across two acres.

Here's Grandpa kaiboshing our plans for rings of fire. Seriously.

Aunty Anne's strategy: Fly like a bat out of hell.

These next two pictures are visual proof of my quest to say true to my authentic self here on this blog. On the course there was indeed a section to parallel park, and apparently even on a lawn tractor it scares the poo out of me...on both runs I trampled the innocent 'cars', I swear I had good intentions :)

"Life is both a major and a minor key, just open up the chord"

2008-09-15T12:04:00.008-06:00

I AM … happy.
I WANT… a macbook.
I HAVE … an indescribably wonderful family.
I KEEP … ticket stubs, birthday candles, and letters.
I WISH I COULD … go skydiving.
I HATE … people who are reckless with other people's hearts.
I FEAR … not saying I love you enough.
I HEAR … the ticking clock of St. Nick...only 100 more days till Christmas!
I DON’T THINK … before I open my mouth sometimes.
I REGRET … nothing.
I LOVE … science fiction, pride and prejudice, the word fanny, and long hugs.
I AM NOT … perfect.
I DANCE … the sprinkler, shopping cart and lawn mower, all preferrably to James Brown.
I SING … loudest alone in the shower.
I NEVER … say never.
I RARELY … wear the same shoes.
I CRY WHEN I WATCH … Steel Magnolias.
I AM NOT ALWAYS … loud.
I HATE THAT … Stephanie Meyer has stopped writing Midnight Sun.
I’M CONFUSED ABOUT … life sometimes.
I NEED … chocolate and laughter.
I SHOULD … get back to work.

Oh my life is changing everyday, in every possible way"

2008-09-12T09:47:00.005-06:00

I am SO over the moon excited, it’s hardly containable.

When I stumbled into this world of wedding photography months ago I couldn’t help but be drawn in by all of the breathtaking portraits, exquisite details and loving stories. I have continued to brighten more and more to the idea of having two of my most favorite things combined into a future career: love and photography to a point where I’m nearly bursting.

I’ve drifted continually from site to site of the many photographers out there, who have now come to be my most prominent influences and inspiration, Jessica Claire, Jasmine Star, Jesh De Rox, and most of all [b]ecker.

[B] started with the idea that “the rising tide raises all ships”, his generous beliefs have morphed into the most phenomenal upcoming resource for new photographers everywhere: The [B] school. After a torturously long, but entirely worth it wait he has unveiled it’s opening October 1, 2008. When I thought I could not possibly wind up with any more enthusiasm an exclusive offer to join in private school was posted and I bubbled over the edge. Come September 17th, you will find me praying to every existing high deity, with credit card in hand, four leaf clover in pocket and a steady finger on the refresh button. Fingers crossed I slide my way in there :)

Oh and here's a teaser for my next post, I promise the photos to come are just as utterly fantastic as this bad boy!

"You think you're one of millions, but you're one in a million to me"

2008-09-09T13:43:00.003-06:00

Saturday morning was my favorite kind of sleepy delight, sandwiched between Layne and Marc, my fingers sticky with jam, and mouth full with biscuits I couldn't help but feel overwhelmingly grateful for my family. I had finally had a chance to get over to my Aunty Pam's house, something I've let be pushed off my plate for far too long since she returned from an unbelievable trip to Norway.

The kids eventually left in their chaotic twister and we spread across the busied counter photographs, brochures, and european chocolate. She shared her trip memories like a collection of preciously whispered tokens and I realized fully how much I really had missed her even just for those couple weeks. There's some piece so large she brings to my life that my hearts feels entirely capable to keep chugging but lacks part of it's usual zest without her. Like a key to let the most ridiculously Camille parts of me shine horrifically and fantastically bright; the story of my life rings happily with her laughter as a permanent slot on its soundtrack.

"This could be the very minute I'm aware I'm alive"

2008-09-05T13:54:00.002-06:00

It’s been nearly a month since and I am still finding myself grappling with stubborn insecurities. And it seems they’ve gotten the better of me.

Again.

Things have happened that I wished I’d wrote here but I guess I just felt too….shy. Now any one within an actual sphere of my world reading this would probably choke with astonishment at such a word in any way attached to my usually frighteningly loud gushing self, but it seems here in this substantial cyberspace of photographer-land I am swallowed in fear and retreat quickly to the safety of daily blog stalking and blank silence.

In feeding off the wonderful quote I added to the left, I am going to truly envelope myself in my own uniqueness. I know the wonderful me, I need to put aside being afraid to share that. Need to remind myself not to feel so discouraged when things don’t come easy, a quality you’d think I’d have grasped by now.

Here’s to my fifth or sixth kick-in-the-ass to smarten up. To be accountable, to be committed. To photography, to this blog, to others around me. To myself.

"I'm hooked on you, I need a fix, I can't take it, Just one more it, I promise I can deal with it"

2008-08-07T11:26:00.005-06:00

So now that I have all that heavy stuff off my chest, I can get onto the juicy stuff :)

I have been (along with 1.3million other people) enthralled with the book series Twilight. I just had to post here how much I loved these books. The latest "Breaking Dawn" came out last week, and I devoured it in under 48 hours. It's that good.

I tell every person I talk to, friends and strangers how fantastic it is. I love books of all shapes and sizes, whether it be science fiction, romance, non-fiction, biographies, I love them all. There is no greater pleasure then to fall into a world someone has created. And I must say for the billionth time what a world Stephenie Meyer's has created.

This last book was everything I had hoped it would be and more. The plot delves into such emotion that it is utterly heart clenching to read it, the good and the bad.

They're turning it into a movie in which the love of my fictional life Edward is played by the ever so dreamy Robert Pattison. I can't wait, click here to catch a trailer, you'll become addicted instantly I swear it.

Edited to add this scan from Entertainment Weekly. Enough Said.

"Makes no difference who you are, Anything your heart desires, Will Come to You"

2008-08-05T12:19:00.000-06:00

There’s no excuse, I just simply let life trample over me. I don’t know what it is about summer but I always feel like there’s eight things tugging at my attention, and my juggling act this year became slightly pitiful.

And amongst the chaos I couldn’t really bring myself to look here, my naively hopeful words plastered in a seemingly haunting way. I promised myself I would be open and honest here, to have a true reflection for the future to see my growth, And in true honesty, I lost faith in this, lost faith in myself.

I let myself go to the bleakest of places, where failures are magnified and problems seem insurmountable. Things seemed to spiral and I let my normally sunny attitude become considerably more cloudy.

And I’m here to apologize to myself, because I know I’m not only better, but stronger than that. And I know I will make this dream happen, it might take a little longer than I’d like but I’ve got to put down my inhibited and bashful ways when it comes to stepping out on that ledge. And I’ve got to untwist my perception that stressed finances is enough of an excuse to quite.

I am vowing here to not let time pass and guiltily neglect this blog, I will ask anyone I can to take their pictures. I will put out everything I have, and in turn create what I know I can be.

"Help me if you can, I'm feeling down. And I do appreciate you being round."

2008-07-05T16:34:00.003-06:00

So this is a bit of an S.O.S. post. I need help, major help!! My cousin-roommate-all-around-life-mate decided atChristmas to join the Walk to End Breast Cancer. Even to just sign up made me burst with pride. Our family history has been consistently riddled with cancer for years, and really any kind of charity work seems not just benefecial for society as a whole, but good for the soul as a whole too.

Now she's got 60km to walk between those two days, and I've watched her weave throughout our neighbourhood blocks to train, guzzle dozens of powerades and pimp the color pink more than you could ever imagine.

And where I thought her greatest challenge would be lengthening her endurance, there's actually been a much larger hurdle to cross. The weekend requires a fundraising goal of $2000.00 dollars. Now this did seem a daunting amount, but I know I thought it would come easily with enough cajoling of family members and bake sales, but at this point I've baked about 18 dozen batches of cookies, we've drawn 50/50 sales and Amanda has sent fourth email requests and she still remains at 36% on her goal thermomemeter.

So really this post is a combination, of both a request for any possible ideas to raise more money--(Please leave bake sales out, I repeat my clothes cannot handle anymore flour/icing sugar stains) And a request that if anyone is actually here reading my vicarious rumblings of life and they would like to help a good cause they would visit Amanda's site and donate.

I know it's asking a lot, especially since if anyone is here, they are most likely strangers, but this is an amazing cause, and even if $10.00is all you can contribue, it makes a difference.

Here is the link to her donation siteIf all you can offer is encouraging words as donation, feel free to leave a post and I'll pass it on to Amanda.

Thank you for listening :)

"You Can't Always Get What You Want"

2008-06-30T13:02:00.003-06:00

So I'm pretty sure that even my most closest of relatives have stopped checking this thing due to complete lack of upkeep and care. Though I do have a legitimate reason (isn't there always one?)

I've got to whisper it really really quietly, as I want neither my Dad nor SAIT to know

...........my laptop broke.

In a catastrophic but completely typical moment said toshiba decided to journey to a better place, a fact that I've been ignoring for some time now. The screen managed to crackle straight down the center, and with naive hopes I psychotically attempted to back it up while working with about 3" of screen. Somewhere around 2am on June the 8th it died so completely, that no matter how hard my fingers crossed and how deeply my technology loving heart hoped, there was no rescure.

It has since been gently ushered to the nearest computer store in an attempt to rescue any bits of life that remain inside. Thus, I have been thouroughly unattached to my blog, email, in essence the world (though to keep things honest here, I have glimpsed quick peeks at facebook and Becker's blog at work- so i'm not entirely unaware :)

I have set up our home computer now and am continuing to play through the pain of no laptop, no photoshop, no anything....looks like I'll be crossing off "Buy a Mac" from my list a little earlier than anticipated. Hopefully I'll start to become a little more regular on here again, as I really do love it!! Besides that chaotic twist, work and my photography class are great, will elaborate more in a better and happier post tomorrow :)

"Just when you think you've got me figured out, the season's already changing"

2008-06-06T00:36:00.004-06:00

So I survived the move, basically unscathed. We did it all on the Sunday, crammed into four hours filled with more than a couple scratched walls, blistered fingers, and ache-y tired limbs. When all was said and done and Amanda and me stood upon a literal sea of boxes crowded on any and every available surface I think we came to the conclusion that this place suited us just fine for the next century or so.

And as to what else I’ve been up to besides laundry and setting up our wireless….I got a new job. I had wanted it in that utterly desperate anxious, but pretending to be totally calm kinda way. Which is never really a good place to be. I had given my resignation at my current job on the optimistic hopes that something miraculous would no doubt fall into my life. Though who knows why this philosophy wormed into my brain, since in surveying the past 21 years, I believe there haven’t been a ton of remarkable phenomenons falling from the sky. But I digress…days ticked by and my anxiety was starting to slightly pass the realm of uncomfortable when I found the most incredible position. Though it did come as a bit of a light in a shady career limbo, I went through several phone and in-person interviews before landing it. I start Monday and will bore you all with more details then since this paragraph is already scarily long!!

Besides work, I started one of my photography courses at SAIT. It was a three hour course, and throughout all the talk of f-stops and white balance all I could think was thank god I was sitting in a classroom feeling so overwhelmingly passionate and not overwhelmingly overwhelmed. I really feel like this last little while has been a turning of a new leaf, and I’m so excited for everything to come.

As an ending, and continuation of the whole new leaf tangent, I started this great project I found while randomly surfing the internet. It’s called a 101 in 1001, here’s a link for anyone who wants to read up on it. It’s like a revised set time bucket list, I think it’s brilliant. I started mine May 31st, so my end day is February 26th, 2011. This would have been my Mum’s 45th birthday, I think she would have liked the idea, I know many of these things stem from things she wanted to do, things we wanted to do together. I will accomplish many of them with thoughts of her, and the constant reminder to live each day to the fullest.

Here’s my list for anyone in need of ideas or a good laugh!!

Camille Elise Catherine's 101 in 1001

Read every Jane Austen book.
Be able to do 20 pushups in a row
Attend the training seminar and become a part of the Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep Organization.
Own a Mac
Learn how to play “chelsea” on the piano
Finish reading Chronicles of Narnia with Layne and Marc (no matter how long it takes!)
Own my own car, even if it’s a beater
Be the owner of a 70-200mm f2.8 L IS
Design my own website
Go to a Becker Workshop
Meet Jesh De Rox
Shoot a wedding completely by myself.
Live in London for at least a year.
Go to WPPI.
Blog everyday for a month
Finish writing my biography
Publish said biography
Shoot a destination wedding
Pay off my student loans
Learn to speak Spanish, fluently…then take a holiday and converse with locals, easily.
Learn to drive standard
Get my own puppy
Spread Mum’s ashes
Learn to play the bass guitar
Go on a hot air balloon ride
Visit New York at Christmas time
Read the bible front to back
go on a road trip with no predetermined destination
fall in love
take a cooking class
start my own photography business
re-learn sign language
pay off every credit card so they’re all at zero
Ask a couple I know if I can do a shoot with them
get my celtic/ayn rand tattoo
Swim in the dead sea
Watch the sun rise and set
Have a full on food fight
go skydiving
Sing Karoke
do a maternity/new born session
Learn to ride a motorcycle
Build a dirtbike
have a full body massage at a spa
spend one week without phone/computer/tv
take a mixology course
ride in the kids cancer ride across canada
go to Disney world-see the harry potter theme park when it’s ready
send a message in a bottle
bake an apple pie from scratch
eat Chinese food out of those cool little containers
skywrite a message to someone
make homemade bread
mail a secret into post secret
build a vinyl collection
Read all 200 of the books on the BBC’s Big Read
Sew an entire quilt by myself
Finish childhood scrapbooking
don’t hit the snooze button for an entire week
watch every episode of sex and the city
See Phantom of the Opera in a theater
Write and mail at least one thinking of you card each month
learn to say I love you in 10 languages
Get British Dual Citizenship
Go without chocolate for an entire month
write a short story
Go skinny dipping
Have all homemade Christmas gifts
Meet Jessica Claire
Learn how to play poker well
Learn how to whistle with fingers
track everything I spend in a month- then design budget
buy the totally rad action set
buy Kevin Kubota actions
pay off library fines-get a new library card
take a creative writing class
bicycle to medicine hat
become a part of the big brother/sister program
buy the perfect cowboy boots-no matter their cost
Go to a Jesh De Rox seminar
Start each day with an apple for an entire month
buy a piece of art from a local artist
Go back and visit Cremona
Take a roadtrip by myself
Live by myself
Have a photograph published
Hold a dinner party-at least three courses
Keep room clean and organized for a week
make a gratitude journal and try to write in at everday
Send Christmas cards on time for pete sake
Read the Quran in its entirety
go see a movie by myself
Organize all of my i-tunes
No fastfood for six months
Second shoot a wedding for someone
learn to surf
Create my own personal logo-design onto business card
Give my card out to 10 people in one week
Throw out custody battle paperwork
Own a shootsac
Make a new list.

Oh, and ps, as a variation of #89. I’m going to try to post this here each entry:

June 6th, 2008 – Five Things I Am Grateful For
a. The brave child cancer survivor who spoke today, there is nothing so humbling than the words of a survivor.
b. The brightness of a new opportunity.
c. Realizing that you can survive a week without the internet.
d. Deep belly laughs (see: www.thepioneerwoman.com)
e. That good/bad feeling when someone says they’ll miss you.

And since posts are boring without pictures here's one of my faves from our first weekend out at the cabin. Have I mentioned it's the happiest place on earth?

Degenerate the faithful with that crazy casbah sound...

2008-05-28T16:12:00.003-06:00

I am so sorry. I promise I am not fully reverting back to my sketch bag ways, I have just had such a crazy week, and it doesn't look like it's going to get much better until well into June.

I do have several catch up posts I want to get to, however they will have to wait till next week, I apologize for the delay but again I must say it's been a little crazy here.

On the agenda this week (Aka descriptions of excuses for my incessant slacking)

Wednesday - Pack every item within entire house, save some pairs of gitch and my toothbrush
Thursday - Work, Attend fancy schmany work thank you wine/cheese partay, Reunite the infamous trio with the classiest of establishments (Cowboys)
Friday - Work, pack everything into moving van
Saturday - Work all day, finish any last minute packing
Sunday - We get the keys!!!! WOOHOO!!!
Monday - Collapse, and then start new job :)

So it's a bit of a stretched couple of days but I do promise I have some fantastic entries coming up, PS Anyone watch the Brothers & Sisters finale? Amanda and I came to the conclusion that it rocked the Casbah!

P.P.S. Forgive any errors, I'm typing this from my ghetto computer at work, it is not equipped with Spell/Grammar Check, sad.

With a bit of rock music, everything's fine...You're in the mood for a dance, and when you get the chance...

2008-05-19T23:32:00.003-06:00

So in my scramble to get my crap together on Friday the thought of posting here completely slipped my mind. Whoops! I promise I’ll get back to posting regular starting….now

The after work rush was indeed induced for the best possible reason, May Long, aka the weekend to open our cabin at Pine Lake. It was beyond glorious but I haven’t had the time to edit the pictures, so I’m going to post my outdoors-ey entry tomorrow.
As for tonight, I am putting up pictures way overdue. Last weekend my best friend Morgan (in depth blog introduction to come at a later date) invited me to her Auntie Shelley’s surprise fortieth birthday. I’ve always been extremely close with their family, though have sadly been slightly out of touch the last couple years; needless to say a couple Corona’s later and we had the party started.

Well into the night Auntie Tracy managed to discover the most remarkable, brilliant, mind-blowingly amazing karoke brought to us courtesy of Shaw on Demand. We spent the night twirling well past the enthusiastic level to the likes of Abba, John Travolta, and my personal favorite Sister Sledge’s “We Are A Family”.

Here are the photos, which barely scratch the surface of my most bottomless love for the Burke Family. Be gentle on the critiques too, some of these were shot by my durable, but not always inspired Olympus Stylus 770.

My favorite of the night...

Life, I love you, all is groovy...

2008-05-15T11:48:00.007-06:00

Sorry I took a little break there between entries, that last one was a little heavy so I thought everyone (me included!) could use a bit of a breather. There has been a lot that has happened in these few days, and I’m stoked to report the little gems I stumbled upon this week.

First off I joined twitter, as you can see it’s been added to those tabs to the left below my friendly little welcome message. So in case you haven’t reached your fill of my crazy little antics you can get an up to the minute update of my day at any time. Convenient aye? I think it takes blog stalker to a whole new level really, haha. Just kidding. Sort of. :)

Besides that, I also found the most fantastic new blog to add to everyone’s favorites. Again found through Jessica Claire (can that blog get any better?) It’s called Pioneer Woman, and I have to say that I spent a good third of my morning yesterday reading the enthralling “Black Heels to Tractor Wheels” story. I mean if the title doesn’t get you, surely the first post describing dreamy Marlboro Man will hook you. Her site is a great eclectic mixture of tales from a ranch life, cooking recipes, romance and home schooling horrors/joys of having four kids. Everyone should go read the latest, and if you’re skeptical in the least, read this entry here, I literally spit sprite through my nose it was so damn funny.

And lastly, through much idiocy on my part I processed the credit card payment to take the pDNA. I would so highly recommend this test, at 208 questions it perfectly assesses where you are in every aspect of your career, from creativity to marketing. I’ve been drooling at the bit for a while now to become a founder, and I’ve got my fingers crossed and several prayers sent up to Allah, God, and Capital One that it can fit on my credit card come June 1st. Anyone who isn’t familiar should visit Dane Sanders blog here for the latest.

I’m sorry this post is picture-less, but I promise I’ll post some downright classics tomorrow. Have a great day!

Being caught in between all you wish for and all you seen, and trying to find anything you can feel that you can believe in.

2008-05-11T22:48:00.002-06:00

The other day for the fourth time I finished Sue Monk Kidd’s The Secret Life Of Bee’s. For anyone who has yet to read this book, you must drive now to your nearest Chapters, Coles, Walmart, anywhere that sells paperback to get yourself a copy. Words cannot possibly describe how this book made me feel.

There’s a quote in it, and it struck me so deeply that I knew I had to share it here:

“No matter how much you thought you could leave your mother behind, she would never disappear from the tender places in you”

I lost my mother two years ago. The topic is one of the few in my life that remains a twisted puzzle of vulnerability and pain that I have difficulty opening up about. The moments I do choose to talk are generally only with those very close to me and mostly laced with such tactless indecent humor that an outsider might not understand my point of view. In true daughter form I take after my mother by masking most obstacles in my life with passionate humor, from a young age I realized life was going to seem a whole lot longer if I couldn’t see the hilarity through the clouds.

Back to the book, needless to say the entire thing made me break down in tears. In a mere 336 pages I felt a chord strike through all the layers in me that seemed to ease the ache deep in those tender places.
Holidays are always a bit of a touchy thing for me, but today I managed to put aside my grief and wacky humor and just be thankful for the eighteen Mothers Day’s I was blessed enough to have with her.

Any little thing to just feel better

2008-05-09T10:21:00.001-06:00

So I just realized that through my buckley’s-induced haze that I never got around to posting that Claire had put some pictures up on her blog from the engagement shoot I got to help her with a couple weeks back.

Michelle and Brad were so unbelievably cute, quite shy in the beginning, but they definitely warmed up to Claire after a couple minutes. Plus as a bonus they brought along their beautiful labs, it’s a miracle she got them both in the frame as they were more than a little anxious to take advantage of the open space at Fish Creek.

Here’s a little sneak peek of my favorite she snapped right near the end of the shoot. Follow this link to her blog to check out the rest. Again I can’t say enough how incredibly thankful and happy I was to be able to tag along and help out!!

Just let me state for the record, We're giving love in a family dose...

2008-05-08T11:06:00.002-06:00

So I am in a much better mood than I was Tuesday, an I know things can only go up from here cause I finally have a day off and am

So, completely ignoring my sulk-fest last time, I’m moving on to write about much happier things.

Thankfully I brought my camera along last weekend when we decided to all head down to Fish Creek Park. It started out as a huge mass, but in the end whittled down to just three. Amanda, Layne and me. There is something so wonderful about spending time with the people you love. These two, just happen to be two of my absolute favorite.

We all bring such unique personalities to the table that when you jumble us together your never quite sure what you’ll get. Needless to say I’m usually the one who’s down for the count laughing a lung up, but on Saturday between Layne and I we had her bust a gut. Thank god I had my camera.

And here are both the goofballs, Amanda on the left, Layney on the right.

And amidst all the laughing, I managed to take what I think has moved into one of my top favorite slots. It is one of the photos where everything managed to be perfect, at least in my mind. Amanda thinks it’s a little bit of an unflattering angle but I think it captures her perfectly. One who is usually so sensible, organized, levelheaded, here she is completely carefree, it’s so unbelievably fantastic. It’s pictures like this that make me know I am moving in a positive forward direction.

And even when you're hope is gone, move along.

2008-05-06T13:36:00.002-06:00

Yesterday I had written an entry to post here, filled to the brim with excitement about my May 17th wedding with Claire. Seems the laws of the universe were out to prove some sort of twisted lesson; a reality pin pricked my May-inspired bliss when Claire emailed to say that it wasn’t going to work. With the wedding only a week and a half away it’s understandable that my lack of experience is more liability than asset. It’s just, it doesn’t make it any easier to swallow.

It’s like I’m standing nose to a wall, not quite sure how to go about breaking through it. I know in my heart that this is what I’m supposed to do; I just can’t seem to find the means to grasp it.

I can grasp the image of the destination, but don’t understand the steps to place to get there. I’m enrolled in several courses, am writing here, am constantly trying to get out there and take pictures that mean something to me, but I just don’t know how to get that practical experience to build a reputable portfolio.

I know many photographers are leery of second shooters, rights of images, someone in your way, one more worry to concern yourself with on an already very important and busy day; I can see that there are many reasons why the idea is less than appealing, I guess I am just holding onto the naïve hope that there has to be someone out there willing to open their knowledge up at some point.

I suppose I should put the Ben and Jerry’s down and get over my pity party, Amanda always says “What’s for you won’t pass you” so I guess I’m just going to put my faith in that.

And I think to myself, what a wonderful world

2008-05-04T22:23:00.002-06:00

It is so unbelievably nice to finally be in a groove with this blog. I can look forward to what little goodies I want to post instead of feeling guilty for having been in ignore mode for days on end.

Last weekend we managed to squeeze in a trip to the barn to soak up all the beautiful sunshine after so much snow. My cousin Layne houses her pony about 45 minutes out of town, and as much as horses make me uneasy I love wandering around all the open space and fresh air.

Here’s a couple pics from the gorgeous day, I’m off to get an early nights sleep and hopefully be rid of this cold for good!

Happy Birthday Aunty Pam, Happy Birthday to you!

2008-05-03T11:11:00.003-06:00

So I'm a little late in posting this since my Aunt's birthday was last weekend, but life has been a little busy. And really, I'm just beyond stoked that this is my fourth day in a row posting consequetive blogs.

But back to my Aunty Pam. I’ve searched and searched, and come to the realization that she hides from my camera way too well. My goal of the week is to try to capture a new picture to post on here.

She is, to say the very least, one of the most important people in my life. Her beauty inside and out is incomparable. I thank everyday for the moments that brought and have kept her in my life. She has the most infinite patience, love and understanding of anyone I’ve ever met. With her constant, never-ending faith in me, it is hard to believe there would ever be a feat I couldn’t overcome.

So last weekend me and my cousin Layne stayed up far past our bed time and decked out the whole kitchen in balloons, streamers and signs. It was beyond fantastic, I didn’t take very many pictures cause I was too busy enjoying a lazy bones Saturday morning, but this one completely froze in time the feeling of the day and our family.
Have a great weekend everyone

Slow down everyone, you're moving too fast...frames can't catch you when you're moving like that...

2008-05-02T14:27:00.002-06:00

There is something so inexplicably unique about that intangible quality kids have to put you at ease. How being around them can completely shift your attitude and frame of mind, no matter where your head began, you end up lying on your back holding your gut at the delicious ache of a deep belly laugh.

Needless to say, I had myself in a cranky funk the other day when my friend Melanie had me over to photograph the two children she nannies. She wanted an impromptu gift to give her boss for his upcoming birthday and I happened to fit the bill. As we ran to the park, it was hard to keep the pessimistic attitude up and I found myself having a blast.

I highly recommend everyone to take a couple minutes this weekend and get familiar with anyone in the single-digit age range :)

So without further ado, ladies and gentleman, Cass and Alexandria…

Take it off like your home alone, you know, dancin in front your mirror while you're on the phone

2008-05-02T00:01:00.002-06:00

Though it is way past my bedtime, I knew I had to come on here even just to post something small. I’ve spent the last 24 hours tucked in bed surrounded by piles of kleenex, mugs of tea, and several bowls of lipton’s finest.

Yep, the flu that has felt inevitable for the past three weeks finally caught up with me. A visit to the doctor is still pending, though I’m hoping against hope I’ll magically awake to clear sinuses and an easy stomach.

Beyond that, the only reason I’m up this late is due to me and my cousin/room mate/all around favorite person Amanda have deemed Thursdays the best television night ever. Grey’s, Lost, The Office, can it get any better? Roll out the popcorn and make sure to get a good seat, cause you’re in it for the long haul starting at 9:00pm. So in honor of my lounging around tonight, I’m posting this hilarious video I saw on youtube a couple days ago as a tribute to The Office, my love for John Krasinski, and general happiness for Thursday T.V.

I'm just beginning, the pen's in my hand, ending unplanned...

2008-04-29T12:40:00.009-06:00

I know, I know, it’s been 2+ weeks and I haven’t posted anything. My boss did finally come back from holidays, and it seemed like the stress from work bled right into the stress for school, and the dreaded f word. Finals.

I’m over them now, so hopefully, with this being my third declaration to post regularly, it will actually happen. I do have so many pictures to post, though for now, I can only post a couple. I’m on a friends computer, and need my laptop for the rest of the pics

But anyways, I had said last post that I had some good things coming up, and last night was one of them!! Shelley passed my name along to the wonderful Claire Cocheme, a local photographer, and I had the amazing opportunity to assist her on an engagement. It was SO incredibly remarkable. If I had any doubts as to making the right decision in focusing my efforts on photography, they were all quelled yesterday.

During and afterwards I felt like a giddy little kid, spouting on and on of engagements, eternal romance, finding your true love. I mean really, we are talking about the girl who could recite single-handedly Pride and Prejudice, not really a shocker that I could fall so in love with this career.

I’m hoping to help Claire out again with a wedding mid-May, and may even have more opportunities sprouting up for the summer. Here is to a fantastic 2008!!!

P.S. : I was feeling a little nostalgic, so here are some oldies, but goodies! And Connie if you're reading this, these are for you :)

P.P.S. : Our family has a slight love affair with dirtbiking, in case anyone didn't gather :) haha.

Life's like a road that you travel on...

2008-04-11T08:22:00.002-06:00

Man, keeping this thing up to date has been nearly impossible lately. I'm just running out the door, a spontaneous trip up to Edmonton to celebrate one of my best friends pending Graduation from Nursing is on the agenda this weekend.

I've got so many wonderful pictures to share (Calgary snowed like 7 inches in the south). And I'm sure with this weekend I'll take many more. I hope all everyone on this front is well, i've got some really exciting things happening in the next couple weeks, and I can't wait to come home a post an overdue long entry.

Here's to the weekend :)

Stay Yourself and Nothing Less....Stay Fearless

2008-04-04T13:47:00.003-06:00

So I am a total slacker. This much is obvious, but I have honestlybeen so completely and utterly swamped. Really to sayswamped is an understatement.

My boss went for holidays and I'm in chargefor the next couple of weeks, so things have been slightlyresembling a type 3 hurricane around here. But enough of the excuses, here I am, and I'm going to try to get this back into a regular habit.

First off, I went to a great seminar last Saturday. Wedding photographer Davide Greene came to SAIT to do a small presentation and I managedto grab some tickets at the last minute and squeeze in.

I really liked a lot of his ideas, and found it great just to get my mind more immersed in the workflow of it all. It was also helpful to see what specific principles have worked to build his success so quickly.

I did try to mingle, though I must truthfullyadmit I'm quite shy and didn't manage a lot more than a whispered hello. My shyness has always been a tad ironic, since really the moment I'm comfortable and let my guard down I'm quite boisterous, loud and outgoing. I suppose that's another goal to set for myself: Get better at opening up more off the batwhen meeting new people.

In other news, I've been going around trying to look at other fellowwedding professionals around Calgary and found a boat load ofbeautiful photography.Though a standout I must say is Shelley of As I See It Photography, who is not only incredibly talented, but so amazingly kind-hearted. I've been talking with her and her generosity with advice has been so helpful.So here's a shout out to her, anyone and everyone should check out her blog here!!!

And with all that, I think I'm caught up. Hope everyone else has had a greatweek, and has an even better weekend :)

Here I Go, Here I Go, Here I Go Again...

2008-03-25T21:28:00.004-06:00

Shame on me. Not only did I seemingly drop off the blog world for a couple days, but I chose Easter as the time to do it. I had been doing so good with the regular postings, but still somehow managed to fall behind this week. Memories past are haunting me with the seemingly dozens of journals dated January 1, followed with the failingly naive “This will be the year I stick to it”….But anyhow, here I am, attempting to make amends JI hope everyone had a great weekend, I managed to finagle my way out of my usual Sunday shift and used the day to finally go see my Uncle Keith’s new place in Sylvan Lake. All of us cousins piled in the car, and with cruise control and some killer mix CD’s Amanda, Jamie, Jeff and I had a flawless trip.

I’m trying to take more pictures but in between my bouts of hysterical laughter and multiple food induced comas I only managed a few. Below is my favorite one I snagged just as we were leaving Calgary. Our Grandma gives us all an ornament each Christmas and despite Jamie’s usual loathing for all things December she’s had this hanging there for months and I knew it would make a nice shot.

Also I wanted to leave a small note in thanks for the couple of fellow photographers that have left little comments here. I cannot in anyway describe the complete happiness it fills me with when I read them. Each time I come home and look and see another I can’t help but yelp out the most hideous squeal of delight (I’m certain my roommates are thrilled with my newfound popularity on the web).

As a note I wanted to see if any of you guys had any advice, I’ve been looking into Dane Sanders and his Fast Track Photographer program. I’ve seen a couple of your blogs and was wondering how the founder membership really works? I’m a student, and well just shelled out for the 5D, so cash isn’t in abundance. But if this is a smart investment for my business/future I’d like to consider it. I’ve been looking into all the seminars/workshops, especially with all of Becker’s recommendations on The B School as of late. If anyone would leave any comments on their opinion, it would be seriously appreciated!!!

Let's Give Them Something To Talk About...

2008-03-20T21:45:00.006-06:00

So, clearly that whole wait another week to buy the 5D was just too long of an estimation because....

....I got it tonight!!!!!!!

I cannot remember a time that i've been so entirely ecstatic, dumbfounded, enthralled, and just plain 100% happy. It is beautiful, more beautiful then I could have ever guessed. I just read the manual back to front, and am impatiently waiting for the battery to finish charging so I can give this baby a whirl.

The salesman at futureshop seemed a little gobstopped when I asked for the 5D, seems like they don't get many high end camera sales usually. I'm sure I made his day when the $3044.00 total rung up. I had a small moment of heart failure signing the receipt, but I know this is the start of something fantastic. Tomorrow I'm going down to The Camera Store and getting my new lense, I'm going to start off with the 50mm F1.4 USM, hopefully one day I can swing the 1.2, but for now this will do.

And...enough of my ravings, I'm off to play with my new toy!!

PS, here are some new shots of me on Christmas morning....I mean, an hour ago :)

You lose, You Learn...

2008-03-18T15:43:00.006-06:00

I've got big news... it looks like I'm going to take the big plunge and buy the Canon EOS 5D next week. While it's *gulp* a lot of money, I know it's a smart investment, and one more thing to seal my commitment to this new stage in my life. Getting over the effect it's going to have on my bank account is definetly made easier by the fact that i've been drooling over this camera for a very long time.

I can still remember my first camera, my Dad bought it for me when I was around 12 years old. (Now for those who don't know me, this is where I insert a small insight to Camille's idiosyncrasies 101 - I am an extremely forgetful person at times - though with time and growing up I get better, I'm sure a phrase often uttered in my house will always be "Has anyone seen my keys/wallet/cell phone?")

But to get back on track, due to my extreme forgetfulness as a child my Dad was hesitant to buy me something so valuable. Persistence paid off though, because after nagging my Dad for weeks he announced he had bought me my very first camera. Ripping it out of its package I found the most appallingly bright yellow Crayola camera anyone has ever seen. First instinct had me crying out at the injustice of it all, but I bit back and remembered money didn't grow on trees, and my track record of being a little scatterbrained was less than encouraging.

So convinced was I to prove to my Dad that I was a responsible young adult, I carried and used that thing for four years until it was in essence, threadbare. Looking back it was one of my first true displays of responsibility, and despite it's appearance I was so unbearably proud of that little camera and the pictures I shot with it. Even now it's blaringly obvious how in love with photography I was, always wanting to document the candid moments in my life.

I think this 5D will certainly add to my skills as a photographer, with all of its manual settings, fancy lenses and 12mega pixels. But I'd like to think that the talent and ability to capture beautiful moments lies within me, whether I'm behind a gorgeous Canon, or my old little Crayola.

Here Comes The Sun

2008-03-15T22:05:00.006-06:00

So here I am at my very first blog entry. A small first step, but I'm positive it's in the right direction! I've recently decided to take the leap of faith and turn a long time passionate hobby into my career.

For as long as I can remember photography has been my one outlet to channel all my turbulent feelings throughout this life. Whether it be joy, love, desperation, sadness...i've vented it all through that one lense.

Though it was my passion, it simmered on the back burner as others pushed me to find a "reasonable" job. Thus leading me to accounting; while not the most stimulating career choice, it proved to be challenging and financially rewarding. With the stability the business image reflected I felt confident in my choice and it has been my life for the past year and a half.

Until one random aligning of fate had me stumble across this website: http://www.thebschoolblog.com/. I firmly believe it was more than a stroke of luck that had me stumble across the amazing Becker (http://www.beckersblog.com/). I downloaded all 57 videocasts and became enthralled with the amazing world of support that he'd created. A particular episode focused on the thought that "we all start somewhere" and since I watched it I realized the changes I wanted to start making in my life. Needless to say I've been on the path to becoming more true to my self since.

So here starts this very first entry, a little rambly but hopefully one step towards a bright future!